While I was out walking today, the song What Do You Got by Bon Jovi somehow found it’s way on my playlist. Yes, I listen to and LOVE Bon Jovi…..lol Not really sure HOW that particular song got on the play list because I only load really high energy tunes when walking and exercising. I guess the HOW doesn’t even matter because I ‘needed’ to hear that song today to remind me of the importance of love.
I’ve received a few emails this past month from coaching clients regarding their relationships. One person felt that her mate only wanted sex. And another client felt his mate only wanted money. I found this quite interesting because given their genders, this is the mindset of a lot of people. Women think all men want is sex and men think all women want is money. My question to them both…..WHAT ARE YOU OFFERING? If a man walks around flaunting how much money he makes, the type of car he drives and the home he lives in, women will tend to think that’s all he has to offer. If a woman walks around flaunting her body, how good she looks and how skilled she is in the bedroom, men will tend to think that’s all she has to offer.
Often we enter relationships with the idea of ‘getting something’, not ‘giving something’. We do this because we feel that we are lacking in whatever it is we are trying to get…..get it?…:-) I’ve been witness to many people jumping from one relationship to the other trying to get what they feel the previous relationship didn’t give them. Talk about a setup for failure. I call them Serial Monogamers….in a loving way of course. I too was a Serial Monogamer. That is until I learned the importance of time ALONE. Time that allowed me to LOOK AT ME. To QUESTION ME. To DISCOVER ME. To LOVE ME UNCONDITIONALLY.
There’s a saying….you can’t give what you don’t have. And if you don’t love YOU, you can’t give love to another. I believe that’s why many women think all they have to offer is their bodies and many men think all they have to offer is their money. And then when someone comes along and CONFIRMS their beliefs, they become upset. Hue-mans….we are some funny Beings…..:-)
If you don’t love yourself and you put all your focus on your body, you will attract someone who focuses on your body as well. If you don’t love yourself and you put all your focus on your money, you will attract someone who focuses on your money as well. It can be no other way.
Remember, you don’t attract what you want. You attract who you are.
For your enjoyment, I’ve inserted the music video for Bon Jovi’s What Do You Got?……:-)